“Encouragement” Part 1: Begin with yourself!

I’m so excited to start a new series this year focusing mainly on Encouraging and Blessing those we come in contact with…please join me as we learn together.

This is Part ONE in the new series-  Encouragement: Begin with yourself!

We have all met people in the community, loved ones and neighbors who need encouragement from time to time. Possibly some more than others, and then there are some who never seem to complain. But truthfully, these folks also can use the encouragement more than we think! Maybe you don’t always know the right “words” to use or how to go about it. I’m praying we can find answers and solutions together as we go on this journey.

First of all, do you know the full meaning of encouragement? Just curious. I thought I did. But I decided to look it up anyway to really get into the depth of it. From Websters Dictionary…

encouragement: n.

1. something that makes someone more determined, hopeful or confident

2. something that makes someone more likely to do something

3. the act of making something more appealing or more likely to happen

Some synonyms I’ll likely use somewhere, sometime as we go along: boost, goad, instigate, stimulate, motivate, spur, edify

So let’s begin within our homes. Our families. Our people we come in contact with. Every. Single. Day.

YOURSELF.

Sometimes I think the home is where there is the greatest need for encouragement, yet it lacks it the most. Possibly it’s because we tend to take loved ones for granted. Possibly because we get so engaged in every day life and forget to edify each other as we should. Maybe your household is so full of activity, with everyone scurrying in and out of the home at different intervals, and you get caught up in the “hurry and scurry”. Possibly you are so distracted with your personal agenda, that you forget to look beyond your small horizon to see the needs of others.

But first, let’s begin with ourselves. I know this sounds a tad selfish, but just like I learned in EMT school years ago- an EMT cannot help other people out of a burning building if you don’t get out yourself first. Then, it is possible to save someone else’s life. This was drilled into us. And I’d like to follow through with this concept.

If you, yourself, is beaten down and depressed in life, who do you think you will encourage? No one! In fact, there’s been many times, I’ve had contact with someone, who “supposedly” came to encourage me or wanted to have coffee with me for whatever reason. And vice versa. But…I came home completely discouraged (yes, the devil aims to destroy) even though they said they were there to “encourage”, their discouragement actually came through so strong, it completely tried to weaken me. The negative always sets out to take over the positive! I’ve learned through our studies recently in Christian psychology, that if you are not strong enough emotionally and mentally in the Lord, do not take on being an encouragement to someone who is depressed. The negative tries desperately to win. Every time. And it will overpower you. A soldier does not go into battle half prepared. Or without his weapon. Be on your guard Christian soldiers!

So then, continuing our discussion, how does one find the time to look beyond self and recognize other’s pain, needs and attention? Is it possible to encourage others though, when you don’t feel so “excited about life” yourself? And how do you begin with yourself? Just a few questions and thoughts to get us started…

These are 10 things I’ve found TRUE for myself:

1. When I rise in the morning: Give me Jesus first of all. This goes such a long way in starting my day on the right foot. It gives me energy and focus for my life. I remember what my purpose is, in life. It gives me a grounding effect on my soul. We need that Spiritual breakfast. As “they” say, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Think about this each morning and purpose to have your Bible “for breakfast”, so to speak. Or along with your morning coffee. And also, don’t forget to “talk” with Jesus. Treat Him as your very best friend. Ask Him to be your strength for the day, for your guidance and wisdom. Maybe you don’t feel like you have time first thing when you arise. Each schedule is different. Possibly there’s little ones in the house who wake up at odd times of the night/morning etc. [I remember this all too well when I was still at home: my mom was overwhelmed with my brother’s {leukemia} care and trips 3 times a week to the hospital for several years. I had a full-time, 60+ hour-a-week job at the nursing home. And since I was {privileged to be} the oldest daughter of 10 children, I was given more duties than most 18 year olds. My tiny sisters became my babies. Day and night.] How does one make time for Bible Study? It may not always be the same time every day, but take at least 5 min. if that’s all the time you can find.

Psalm 16:11 ESV You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

2. Listen to uplifting, Godly music! I love turning on a soothing Gospel CD or a radio station, as I clean, prepare food or fold laundry. Music has been known to lift one’s spirits in ways that can’t be explained. Hum along. Dance with your little children if you feel like it. 🙂 Habakkuk 3:18 ESV Yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation.

3. Memorize a few key verses that inspire you on your spiritual journey. Esp. for the times you are struggling with having a good attitude towards someone, or dealing with life’s problems or whatever you might be facing. The devil does not enjoy hearing you speak the Word of God out loud. So do it. Just because and on purpose. 🙂 Pin up verses throughout your home as little tidbits of encouragement you can see easily and quickly.

4. How about a quick morning/afternoon walk or run outdoors when you get a chance? This allows for quiet meditation in the beauty of nature surrounding us. (Esp. if you live in CO) 🙂 Or put your kiddos in a stroller. Take them with you! It may help put one to sleep…On a side note: Apparently I’ve walked enough in my neighborhood that even the neighbor man commented one time that I’ve really lost weight lately. Never mind he was so drunk, he was leaning on the fence for support, the entire conversation! And no, there hasn’t been that much weight loss around here. Unfortunately. 😦 But this got me thinking: walking can also bring up conversations with your neighbors! Another way to reach out -beyond ourselves!

5. Ask someone for help when you feel completely overwhelmed and exhausted. Sometimes I think ladies/mothers find it so hard to ask for help, for fear it will appear they are failing. [Somehow. But… not sure who would be the judge on that. And not sure why it matters what another lady might think. Or what the community would think either whether you’re successful or “failing” in this way. Did you ever think about that? Why are people judged accordingly whether they can “do it all” or whether they ask for help? Since when and why?! By the way, this is a spirit of fear. ]

6. Laugh. That’s right! Sometimes you just need a really good belly laugh to let go and enjoy life again. This is something my husband and I love to do together. It releases many feel-good endorphins in your brain. Makes your brain think that life is great! Garrett and I love watching AFV if we happen to have a free evening and need a good laugh. We laugh until we cry. Nothing wrong with that.

Proverbs 17:22 ESV A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

7. How about taking care of yourself with nutrition, vitamins and good-for-you food? Awhile back I watched the documentary, “Super size me”. It was very interesting to say the least. After dining in McDonald’s fine dining for a month, (three times a day) the man’s health had gone down hill very badly.He became lethargic and lazy. Gained lots of weight and felt sick. You truly are what you eat. Bring on the healthy fats, protein, fresh veggies and lean meats! This will also help you mentally. Even just the thought of doing something healthy for yourself, can help you function better!

8. Tell a loved one how much you love them and care for them. Even though you feel you need to hear the words yourself, say it first to someone else. It’s very likely they will in return tell you how much you mean to them. It’s kind of like using reverse psychology on yourself. 🙂 Give a hug to a loved one- because, just think, you’re actually getting one as well in the same deal. Kinda cool, actually.

9. I love working on small hobbies when I feel sorta blah. Maybe you don’t feel you have time for that. But seriously, does the laundry have to be done this very minute? Or how about spending an hour just reading a story to your children? Do something fun for a little while! Put a puzzle together. Create things out of play dough. Or try that {Pinterest} idea you’ve been thinking about. Or how about a game of Memory?

10. Bless someone else [and it will be returned to you with blessings ten fold]. I have certainly found, that if I am having a discouraging day, and I go out of my way to help someone else, my day is suddenly much brighter and more joyful! Reach out, touch someone else around you. You will find someone who has life much more difficult than yourself. If you care to look. Guaranteed. Maybe it’s just a small act of kindness. Maybe it’s cleaning someone’s house, or taking a hot meal to a poor, needy family. We will get into this more when we talk about “Encouraging our community” in an upcoming blog.

While there are many other ways to encourage yourself, try a few of these this week and see what happens!

Btw, it really helps to have a husband’s shoulder to have a good cry on, just because, when you need to. 😉 Sometimes we ladies have a few hormonal moments, and it’s nothing to be embarrassed of! I’m just thankful God gave me a man who is understanding and loving no matter what. I praise God for this.

Until next time, be BLESSED in the Lord and encouraged to live the life He has given you!